Leadership Lesson from the Family Dinner Table

One of the rituals I most treasure is Sunday dinner with my family. Although we eat together as often as possible, it's usually the one time I know my wife, three kids and I can sit, eat, and enjoy each other's company. Hectic school, practice and homework schedules make it tough during the week to do anything other than a quick meal for the kids before they go to bed. Time just doesn't allow for anything more substantive.

This past Sunday, as the kids were cracking up at my jokes (more like me laughing at myself), I realized how infrequently opportunities like this exist at the office.

Time for laughing, getting to know people, asking about life outside the office, what their dreams are, what makes them tick...these are things any leader should know about his or her team. And you simply can't learn that within the normal work environment. Everyone is too busy and focused on their work (as they should be). Conversations are generic. Without truly understanding what motivates your team, your strategy and direction is going to be broad. You won't know exactly what buttons to push.

As a leader, these conversations can also provide insight into your employee's future. Do they really want to be doing what they are doing? Are they passionate? Do you see untapped potential? You can't get that during the regular course of the day outside of judging their current work product, which rarely tells the whole story.

You would be amazed at what 15 monthly minutes of genuine conversation over lunch, during a break, a scheduled meeting or after work can provide for your leadership skills. The person on your team will feel appreciated, and you will know how to better motivate them.

Over the course of a year, just 15 minutes a month would equal three hours of conversation focused on the individual outside of the daily grind. Say you have 5 members on your team. That's 15 hours of time you've dedicated to getting to know them better. If you upped it to 15 minutes a week, you'd be at 65 hours a year.

Talk about time well spent...